Today's Shoutout is 2 Bubbly Blackgirl
Check Out Getting Over It
The answers to life inquiries manifests itself in the most unexpected forms. While we can surely seek them out, they’re better received when they reveal themselves, naturally.
Everything we go through in life is a part of a larger journey, that requires us to endure certain parts so that we may grow into better beings. Before we walked we first crawled. We could not ride a bike, without first learning with training wheels, and a helmet, and kneepads.
Such is the same for relationships. No one wakes up one day Married, and or magically with the “Man of their Dreams”. Nor do they abruptly go from a break up to quickly being “Over It!” Hopefully, in due time they will get to that point, where they’ve successfully and happily moved on, but such is not a process that can happen overnight.
I’ve attempted to just cut things off with the Ex. To go cold turkey, and not take his calls or just simply not see him. Besides, everyone has told me to just cut him off completely. I’d heard their stories about how they’d gotten over and moved on from their Infamous Ex(es). The recurring theme had been that one day they had just had enough, and voila they were soon on to the next.
But no one tells of the days before, of cried tears and pathetic wishes on shooting stars. No one utters the longings felt for loves now past. No one tells of the journey that led up to that moment of “Enough. I’m over it.”
Sometime ago, the most random person gave me the best advice about how to deal with the awkward relationship I now have with my Ex. Her words, encouraged me to let things play out between us as they are. Wait, before you holler STUPID, from the tips of your tongue, here’s why.
She confirmed that I would get to that point where I’m fed up or just tired of the back and forth, but the abrupt cut off, only inspires more of the merry-go-round. Instead, she recommended that I let this “quasi” relationship, run its course. The course would get me to that breaking point. And that’s when it will be over.
Surprisingly (or not), I can’t help but to agree with her.
So, instead of fighting the wave, I went along with it. I enjoyed the beautiful moments we shared, such as quiet walks or weekend breakfasts. Even the nights spent together. Instead of fighting in my head, “Where’s this going?” “Why doesn’t he want me back?” I just relaxed and enjoyed it all.
Shortly after, my moment came. Followed by the point where I just couldn’t do it anymore, and the feeling of another tear rolling down my cheek angered me. The thought of telling another, “I HATE MY EX Story”, though, made me laugh. It got to the point where I could no longer be mad at him, but instead at myself for enabling him…Yep, that was the icing of my moment and the motivation I needed to strengthen myself to getting over it.
2 comments:
She is sooooooooo right!! My cuz went back and forth with a relationship that wasn't the best. No matter how bad it got..she always went back. She asked me "why cant she just let go"? I told her she had yet to hit her braking point. She was not fed up yet..but when she got to the point she would know it. It's funny how she would say.."I'm done" and I would tell her.."nope you are not done yet". And surely I was right. She finally felt the feeling of being done...so done that she was no longer angry. Just tired and wanted to be rid of it all. I told her she has reached the finish line..she is finally DONE!!
So I thought...years later..they married!! New drama now, kids are involved. Oh well....lol
@Tia's Real Talk...Some ppl are only meant 2 b in ur life for a season but we like idiots continue u 2 hold on 2 something thats not there....My mother used 2 say that "if you are sick and tired of being sick and tired" then its time 2 move on....apparently not smh lls
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